華閱文章網1.1分鐘簡單英語笑話小品
你們也要演英語小品啊 我有一篇 （沒演過哦） 就是人多了點 七個人 但愿你能分配好 中文：A（衣衫襤褸） B（衣著光鮮） C小花 D小草 E椅子 F新聞記者 B坐在E上吃東西，A一乞丐上前 A：先生，先生，請給我些面包，謝謝，我餓得不行了。
B：（厭惡）讓開，讓開。（然后便起身離開，這時他的錢包掉到E上頭了） A：先生，先生（A看見后，立即拾起，追上了走遠的B） B：讓開，讓開啊，我沒吃的了，也沒錢了（看也不看A，仍自顧自地走了） C：他真愚蠢啊 D：是啊是啊（D點頭附和） A：可……先生……您聽我說……（仍拉著B衣服的后擺） B：挖，你這人怎么這么討厭！（還是沒有回頭看A一眼） C：椅子啊，你會不會覺得剛剛坐在你身上的人特愚蠢？E：唉，人總是這么愚蠢啊~~~~ D：是啊是啊 與此同時A與B還在糾纏，這時E終于隱忍不住爆發了。
E：先生！你的錢包丟了！你怎么這么傻啊。A與B同時回頭，看見了那會說話的椅子E，嚇昏過去了。
這一幕恰巧被經過的F看見了。于是F就報道了這一事件。
F：大家好，我是新聞記者F，今天我看見了一個奇異的現象，一個椅子說話了，兩個人被嚇昏了，下面我將采訪一下被嚇昏的兩個人。B：哦，上帝，哦，媽媽。
F：這個人傻了，我們不鳥他了，下面我采訪一下另一個人吧，請問你為什么不告訴他，他的錢包丟了？A：對不起，我不知道“錢包”這個單詞怎么講…… F：通過這一事件，我們可以認識到，掌握一門外語的重要性，以及金錢給人類帶來的影響。是嗎，椅子？E：是啊，是啊（E傻傻地拼命點頭） C：唉，人可真愚蠢，椅子也被他們弄傻了。
D：誰讓這是一個童話呢…… 英語：A:sir,sir,please give me a piece of * you,sir.I'm hungry to die.B:get away,get away,dirty man.A:sir,sir!!B:run away,please run away.I have no food,and I don't have money,either.C:hey,xiao D,he is so foolish,isn't he?D:yes,yes.A:but。.sir。
.please listen to me。..B:wa,why are you so disgusting!!C:hey,chair,do you feel the man sat on you a moment ago is very stupid.E:ai,pretty flower,do you know,men are always very silly.D:yes,yes!!E:sir!you lost your wallet!can't you be more clever?F:good morning,everybody.I'm a jonrnist F. Today I saw a very weird thing--a chair open her mouth,and two men are frightened to *,I will intenview the two nozzy man.B:wo,my god,wo,my,mum.F:I'm sorry to tell you this man has been * needn't take notice of * me interview the other man,hello,man,can you tell men why didn't you tell him he lost his wallet?A:I'm sorry,I don't know how to speak "錢包" in english。
F:dear audience,through this thing we can learn that how improtant it is to mastery a foreign language,and how lagre the money affect * that all right,chair?E:yes,yes.C:ai,men is so silly.D:don't believe us,it is just a fairly tale.。
2.搞笑簡短的英語小品
The little girl liked wearing a red coat. So everybody called her Little Red * day, her grandma had a cold. Her mother said to Little Red Coat, “my dear, send some bananas and cakes to your grandma.”As she walked through the forest, a wolf saw her, “Hello, litter girl. Where are you going?”“I'm going to my grandma's house. She has got a cold.” Said Little Red Coat.“Where does she live?” asked the wolf.“She lives in the house near the forest. There are some big trees in front of her house.” Said Little Red Coat. “Bye-bye, little girl.” The wolf ran to the grandma's *a asked, “Who is it?”“It's me, Little Red Coat.” said the wolf.“Come in, please.”The big wolf opened the door and walked into the room. He ate Grandma * put on Grandma's coat and trousers. Then he lay in * Red Coat walked into her grandma's room. “What big eyes you have got, Grandma!” she said.“Because I want to see your pretty face.”said the wolf.“What a big mouth you have got, Grandma!”she said.“Because I want to eat you, my dear.”said the wolf.“Oh, no!”cried the little * bad wolf ate Little Red Coat, * wolf was sleeping on Grandma's * this time, a hunter came and saw the wolf. “What a big stomach he has got! Grandma must be in his stomach.”thought the * hunter cut open the wolf. Grandma and Little Red Coat were still alive. They jumped out of the *a and Little Red Coat were very happy. “Thank you.”they said to the hunter.
幫你沾來的，呵呵
3.小學生英語話劇劇本,要簡短的,
Little Red Riding Hood 小紅帽第一場：Little Red Riding Hood家Mum： （媽媽拿著一個籃子，把桌紫的水果放在籃子里）Little Red Riding Hood：（唱著歌，歡快地跑進來）Hi,mummy, what are you doing?Mum： （一邊把水果放在籃子里，心事重重地說）Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to * Red Riding Hood：（邊提起籃子，邊點頭說）Ok!Mum： （親切地看著Little Red Riding Hood說） Be good. Be * Red Riding Hood: Yes ,*e, *: Bye-bye. Darling.第二場：在路上（一陣輕快的音樂遠而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎著籃子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁）Little Red Riding Hood: Wow!Flowers, how beautiful！ （放下籃子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three *：（隨著一陣低沉的音樂，Wolf大步地走上臺）I am wolf. I am hungry. （做找東西狀，東張西望） Here is a little red riding hood. Hi! Little Red Riding Hood. Where are you going？ （做狡猾的樣子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼）Little Red Riding Hood：（手摸辮子，天真地回答）To Grandma'*a is *：（自言自語）I' ll eat Grandma. But……（對Little Red Riding Hood說）Hey, look! 6 little baby * Red Riding Hood：（和6只鴨子隨著音樂翩翩起舞）Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大樹后）Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello! Baby ducks,how are you?Six Ducks:We' re * you. Where are you going?Little Red Riding Hood:To Grandma'*, I must go, * Ducks:Goodbye.第三場：Grandma家Grandma： （喘著氣出場，顫顫悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床邊，喘了幾口，打幾個哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。）
Wolf：（從樹后出來，邊走邊說）I am very hungry now. （做找尋的樣子）Where is Grandma' s house？ （高興地對觀眾說）Aha , it's here.（敲門）Bang, Bang, *a: Who is it?Wolf：（裝出Little Red Riding Hood的聲音，一邊得意地搖動尾巴，一邊說）It's me. Little Red Riding *a： （邊說邊起床） Come in, come *：（得意洋洋地走到床邊） Grandma , I'll eat *a： （驚慌失措地抓緊衣服，瞪著眼睛，邊叫迫從床上滾到地上）灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翹起大拇指）Yummy!I'll * Red Riding Hood：（高興地敲門）*：（裝扮成Grandma的聲音） Who is it?Little Red Riding Hood:It's me。
Little Red Riding Hood. What a strange noise!Wolf:Come in, Come * Red Riding Hood：（蹦跳著進來，把籃子放在桌紫，走到床前一看，跳回幾步）Oh! What are big ears!Wolf:I can listen to your sweet * Red Riding Hood:Wow! What a big eyes!Wolf:I can see you pretty * Red Riding Hood:Oh! What a big *:I can hug * Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，邊摸邊說）Look! What a big hands?Wolf：（從床上跳起來說）I can eat you!Little Red Riding Hood：（拼命地跑）Oh!No! No!Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃狀，拍拍肚子說）It's delicious. I still sleep. I like *： （一邊拿著槍，一邊做尋找狀出場）Where's the wolf? Look! A door.（推門）The wolf is *：（發出呼呼的響聲）Hunter： （端起槍想打，又放下）What a big stomach！ （摸摸Wolf的肚子）Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside .I must be hurry.（從桌紫拿起剪刀，舉起） Look! Scissors. （做剪Wolf的肚子）Cut, cut, * Red Riding Hood/Grandma:Thank *: Grandma ,give me some needles and thread. Little Riding Hood ,Give me some *a： （從桌紫拿來針線）Little Red Riding Hood：（搬來幾個石頭）One, two, *： （把小石頭裝進Wolf的衣服里）Grandma: I'll thread *： （拿起槍）Woke up!Wolf：（起床，兩手托著大肚子）My stomach is so *: You big bad wolf, raise your arms!Wolf：（邊跑邊說） Help! Don't shot me!Hunter： （開槍）Bang, bang!Wolf： （應聲倒下）Hunter: The bad wolf is * Red Riding Hood和Grandma:Yeah! Thank * Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）： Thank you。
4.4人短,簡單的英語小品
《男孩和他的樹》a boy and his treea long ago,there was a huge apple tree.a little boy love to come and play around it * climbed to the tree top,ate the apples,took a nap under the shadow…he loved the tree and the tree loved to play with * went by…the little boy had grown up and he no longer played around the tree * day,the boy came back to the tree and he looked."come and play with me ,"the tree asked the boy ."i am no longer a kid,i don't play around trees anymore."the boy replied,"i want toys.i need money to buy them.""sorry,but i don't have money…but you can pick all my apples and sell *,you will have money."the boy was so excited .he grabbed all the apples on the tree and left * boy never came back after he picked the * tree was * day,the boy returned and the tree was so excited."come and play with me ,"the tree said."i don't have time to play.i have to work for my * need a house for * you help me?""sorry,but i don't have a house .but you can chop off my branches to build your house."so the boy cut all the branches of the tree and left * tree was glad to see him happy but the boy never came back since * tree was again lonely and * hot summer day,the boy returned and the tree was delighted."come and play with me !"the tree said."i am sad and getting * to go sailing to relax * you give a boat?""use my truck to build your * can sail faraway and be happy."so the boy cut the tree truck to make a boat .he went sailing and never showed up for a long *y,the boy returned after he left for so many years."sorry,my * i don't have anything for you * more apples for for you…“the tree said."i don't have teeth to bite."the boy replied."no more truck foe you to climb on.""i am too old for that now."the boy said."i really can give you anything…the only thing left is my dying roots."the tree said with tears."i don't need much now,just a place to rest.i am tired after all these year" the boy replied."good!old tree roots is the best place to lean on and *,come sit down with me and rest."the boy sat down and the tree was glad and smiled with tears……this is a story of * tree is our * we were young,we loved to play with mom and dad……when we grown up,we left them…only came to them when we need something or when we are in * matter what,parents will alway be there and give everything they could to make you * may think the boy is cruel to the tree but that how all of us are treating our * is too slow for those who wait,too swiftfor those who fear,too long for those who grieve,too short for those who rejoice,but for those who love,time is eternity.。
5.小學生英語話劇劇本,簡短搞笑的,適合女生的
燭光，紅酒，溫馨的晚會
貂蟬：備哥哥。
劉備：嗯。
貂蟬：備哥哥。
劉備：嗯。.
貂蟬：你的耳朵為什么像拉面一樣長？
劉備：嗯。。這個。
貂蟬：備哥哥。
劉備：哎
貂蟬：看你后面
孫尚香【一臉火氣】：。。你們兩個。
旁白：在絕色美女面前，連一代梟雄劉備也支支吾吾的，至于耳朵為什么這么長，看看香香那副尊容就明白了。
（自化英語）
6.急需短篇搞笑兒童小品
A：大家晚上好嗎？（很痛苦，很無助地打招呼，待觀眾響應后） 可我過得不咋的啊！ B：哎！人活著真累，站著就想睡，去食堂還排隊，吃飯沒香味，學習啊，特疲憊！ 為啥啊？四六級唄！不和你們聊了，我要去綜合樓前的小樹林里背英語單詞了。
BYE BYE！（回頭面朝觀眾）我還不想當電燈泡呢！得了，就在這兒背吧！ A：（坐在地板上嘰里呱啦背單詞） B：日子過得好難，看到英語就煩，說是不想再考了那是扯淡，離我（扳手指數到7 ）第七次補考還剩三十二天了。 A：干（HA 念第二聲）呀？沒看到我在這兒背單詞？吵什么吵？ B：哦，不好意思。
我也想在這兒背一會兒單詞。 A：啥？你也在這兒背？這兒？（指地上）就這兒？ B：不錯，就這兒。
雖然地上臟了一點，將就一下算了。（收回A得手指） A：你還將就一下？對不起，我將非常鄭重而又沉重地對你宣稱：這個位子我已經占 了。
B：這兒也能占？怎么占啊？ A：看來你是不到黃河心不死，不見棺材不落淚。（從地上拿起一張“心相印”牌衛生紙） 看見了吧？一張衛生紙，“心相印”牌的（聞一下）賊香！ B：這——這——這也行啊！ A：占座四大件，大學都傳遍。
沒有書包用坐墊，沒有坐墊用名片，實在不行，衛生紙 鋪遍。地球人都知道。
（對B）就差你了。 B：好好，算你行！我是火星上來的行了吧？ A：不像（打量B）像土星上來的。
B：兄弟，咱倆還是背單詞吧。 A：干（HA 念第二聲）這么著急啊？補考四五次了吧？ B：（握A的手）知音知音啊！我補考六次了。
A：放開（甩A的手）誰是 你的知音啊！我才補考四次呢！ B：哎，因為這四級，我都和女朋友黃了。 A：啊！連鎖反應這么大啊了（努力擠眼淚，用吐沫摸在眼角扮眼淚同情0說出來哥 們和你一起分擔吧！ B：我不想說。
A：說啊！ B：俺不嘛！（作忸怩狀） A：說出來大家可以和你一起分擔嗎？免得憋在心里悶得慌，大伙兒說是不是啊？（ 提高聲音） B：哎！（低頭陷入無盡的往事回憶之中）那是在一個月朗風清的晚上 A：（張開雙手）ROMATIC! B：我拉著她的手，放在我手心（拉著A的手）我知道她根本沒有對我生氣（模仿 《沖動的懲罰》聲調） A：天還沒黑呢！（模仿B的女朋友） B：沒有人看到我們倆的。 A：討厭！（捶B肩膀） B：小麗啊！你到底喜歡我哪一點啊？ A：不告訴你！ B：我長得不帥！ A：我不在乎！ B：我沒有錢啊！ A：我只要有你就行了。
B：我還有很多壞習慣得，喜歡抽煙，喝酒。 A：哪個男人不抽個煙喝點酒什么的啊。
B：我還會耍流氓！ A：你真討厭！男人不壞，女人不愛！ B：我四級還未過呢！ A：小兔崽四級沒過還有時間泡妞呀！也不撒泡尿照照！ B：就這樣 A：黃了，熟了，可以吃了。說真的，我也不比你好多少啊！ B：敢情你也有苦衷 A：哎，那一次我在225號公共巴士 B：去三好街，老擠了。
A：對了，人都快被擠成相片了。就在這擁擠不堪的巴士上，我是東搖西晃前赴后繼 一不小心—— B：撞死了。
A：你咋就不能說一句好話啊！撞死了誰做你的搭檔啊！踩到后面人的腳了。我回頭 一看，原來是一個身材魁梧，黃頭發，藍眼睛，白皮膚—— B：你說老外得了唄！ A：我一看是老外，咱可不能失態，于是我露出一個少男特有的迷人微笑：I'm sorry! B:Oh,I'm sorry too ! A：我這心一想：啊，人家老外 sorry two,Oh,I'm sorry three. B:What are you sorry for? A：哎呀！這老外是寸步不讓啊，他都Sorry four 了，不行，咱好歹也是學了七八年的 啞巴英語了，我連忙說Oh,Oh,Oh,I'm sorry five! B:Sorry five?HA !HA! HA ! A：這老外還敢取笑我，氣剎吾也！I'll give you some colour to see see! B：（模仿老外口音）什么？你要給我一點顏色看看！ A：我一聽，太他媽的傷自尊心了，于是一橫心就打算把這破英語搞好，做一個新時代 的有為青年（擺一個姿勢） B：對！咱倆好好學英語，有困難要學，沒有困難創造困難也要學。
A：到那時候《紐約時報》倒著看 B：百老匯大街都走遍 A：好來塢大片全部看 B：中文英文隨便 A：為社會作大貢獻 B：找女朋友的愿望得先實現！ A：只要英語學得好，不怕女朋友跟人跑。以后工作賺美鈔，四級優秀少不了。
B：啥也別說了，就在這兒背單詞吧！ A：還是回去吧，后面還有節目在排隊呢！ B：那走吧！（挽A的手）。
7.有什么比較簡單又搞笑的英語小品么
Publisher:lthldm Date:2009-03-03
Dionysus was the god of * was the son of Zeus by Semele. When his mother was burnt to death in the glory of Zeus .He was still a helpless * father trusted his upbringing to some mountain fairy maidens .They tookthe greatest care of him. Under the tutorship of Silennus,the Satyr, he was introduced to all the secrets of nature and the culture of the wine.
He travelled far and wide in his carriage drawn by wild beasts. He was said to have been to India and Ethiopia .Wherever he went, there was music and song and *endants,known as
the Bacchantes,were noted for their noiseand disorder.A most wild,noisy crow,they drank,danced andsang in a careless * women Bacchantes were infamous for their excessive immodesty and disgraceful excitement .
Tags: Dionysus , Greece Myth ,
8.幼兒園六一英文情景劇簡單
Three Little Pigs 三只小豬 Mother pig: You have grown up. You must make 豬媽媽：你們已經長大了，你們得 your own houses. 為自己蓋間房。
Goodbye, little pigs. Build a house. 再見，孩子們。去蓋間房。
Be careful of the wolf. 小心狼。 Pigs: Yes, Mum. Goodbye. 三只小豬：好的，媽媽。
再見。 Wolf: I'm hungry. Look! Three little pigs 狼：我餓了。
看，三只小豬可 for dinner. Mmm. 以做我的美餐。 Sister pig: What are you doing, brothers？ 豬妹妹：哥哥，你們在干什么？ Ding-Ding: I'm building a house with leaves. 丁丁：我在用樹葉蓋房子。
Dong-Dong: I'm building a house with sticks. 東東：我在用樹枝蓋房子。 Sister pig: But leaves aren't strong. 豬妹妹：可是樹葉不牢固。
樹枝也不 And sticks aren't strong. 牢固。 Brother pigs: Yes, we know. But it's easy. 豬哥哥：我們知道。
但它很容易。 What are you doing, sister？ 你在干什么？ Sister pig: I'm building a house with bricks. 豬妹妹：我在用磚頭蓋房子。
Brother pigs: Bricks! That's very difficult. 豬哥哥：用磚頭蓋，那太難了。 Sister pig: I know. But bricks are strong. 豬妹妹：我知道，可是磚頭很堅固。
…… Brother pigs: Oh, we're finished. Let's have 豬哥哥：噢，我們蓋好了。我們打 a nap. 個盹吧。
Sister pig: My house is finished. My house 豬妹妹：我的房子蓋好了，我的房 is strong. 很堅固。 Wolf: Little pigs. Little pigs. Open your 狼： 小豬，小豬，快開門！ Doors! Brother pigs: No. No. Go away. 豬哥哥：不開，不開。
快走開。 Wolf: This is very easy. Sticks and leaves 狼：這太容易了。
樹枝和樹葉 aren't strong. 都不牢固。 Storyteller: The wolf blows the houses down. 講故事者：狼吹倒了房屋。
丁丁和東 Ding-Ding and Dong-Dong run 東跑到龍龍家。 to Long-Long's house. Brother pigs: Help! Help！ 豬哥哥：救命！ 救命！ Wolf: Stop, you two pigs. 狼： 站住，你這兩只小豬。
Brother pigs: Open the door, sister. The wolf 豬哥哥：妹妹，快開門。狼來了， is coming. Let me in. 讓我們進去。
Long-Long: Come in, please. Don't worry. 龍龍：快進來。別擔心，我的 My house is strong. 房子很堅固。
Wolf: Where did they go? Oh they are 狼：他們跑哪兒了？噢，他們 Here. Little pigs. Little pigs. Open 在這兒。小豬，快把門打 the door！ 開。
Three pigs: No. No. Go away. You bad wolf. 三只小豬：不開，不開。快走開。
你這只惡狼。 Wolf: I'll blow it down. 狼：我要吹倒它。
Storyteller: The wolf blows and blows. He 講故事者：狼吹呀吹，它不停地吹。 blows and blows. But the house 可是房子非常堅固。
9.搞笑的英語短話劇
說的是一個人的三個夢境，他在夢境中大徹大悟，徹底改變了他的人生。
At this moment, his feelings were complex. His heart was filled with startling, guilty conscience, pity, regret, or even the thoughts of death. Actually, what he was seeking for in the passed hundres of thousands of days was denied by himself. Several years ago, in his opinion, money was tempting, because it was as sweet as honey, as mellow as good wine, and as warm as sunshine. Reputation was charming, because it led to flowers, applauds and admiration from uncoutable fans. That who owned money and reputation got a key to open the successful door, a handling stick to control other lives, an insurance to live a rich and happy life.
But all things had changed. Money was not so important at that time. When he truly had enough money, loosing true friendship and sincere love or even ignoring mother's death were the results. It's too bitter that except living with immense money, he had nothing. Reputation was not important, either. When he really gained high reputation, his private life was exposured in the sunlight, his words were commented by the public and his behaviours must be cautious so as to protect his high repitation. Was it worthy? Of course not.
Therefore, what could *** do? ***'s current life was boring. Both wealth and fame lost their attraction. Without plans, relatives, dreams and motivation to keep living in the world, he wanted to die. In church, he repented before the God's portrait and begged for going to the west. To his surprise, God was suddening standing before him and saying “ I'm sorry to hear that, misearable man. If you have no choice you can come to paradise. Maybe it's a better alternative for you than to keep on beating and insulting your weaker neighbourhoods, who were as bitter as you.” But God emphasized if *** killed himself, God would refuse to receive him.
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其中，***是人名，你們自己編一個吧！
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