華閱文章網1.三分鐘幽默英語演講
A Boy and His Tree A long time ago, there was a huge apple tree. A little boy loved to come and play around it every day. He climbed to the tree top, ate the apples, took a nap under the shadow… He loved the tree and the tree loved to play with him. Time went by…The little boy had grown up and he no longer played around the tree. One day, the boy came back to the tree and looked sad. “Come and play with me,” the tree asked the boy. “I am no longer a kid, I don't play around trees anymore.” The boy replied, “I want toys. I need money to buy them.” “Sorry, but I don't have money…but you can pick all my apples and sell them. So, you will have money.” The boy was so excited. He picked all the apples on the tree and left happily. The boy didn't come back after he picked the apples. The tree was sad. One day, the boy returned and the tree was so excited. “Come and play with me.” The tree said. “I don't have time to play. I have to work for my family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?” “Sorry, but I don't have a house. But you can cut off my branches to build your house.” So the boy cut all the branches of the tree and left happily. The tree was glad to see him happy but the boy didn't appear since then. The tree was again lonely and sad. One hot summer day, the boy returned and the tree was delighted. “Come and play with me!” the tree said. “I am sad and getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself. Can you give me a boat?” “Use my trunk to build the boat. You can sail and be happy.” So the boy cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and did not show up for a long time. Finally, the boy returned after he left for so many years. “Sorry, my boy. But I don't have anything for you anymore. No more apples for you.” the tree said. “ I don't have teeth to bite.” The boy replied. “ No more trunk for you to climb on.” “I am too old for that now.” the boy said. “I really want to give you something…the only thing left is my dying roots.” The tree said with tears. “I don't need much now, just a place to rest. I am tired after all these years.” The boy replied. “Good! Old tree roots are the best place to lean on and rest. Come here, please sit down with me and have a rest.” The boy sat down and the tree was glad and smiled with tears… This is a story of everyone. The tree is our parent. When we were young, we loved to play with Mom and Dad… When we grow up, we leave them, and only come to them when we need something or when we are in trouble. No matter what, parents will always be there and give everything they could to make you happy. You may think that the boy is cruel to the tree but that's how all of us are treating our parents. 很久以前有一棵蘋果樹。
一個小男孩每天都喜歡來到樹旁玩耍。他爬到樹頂，吃蘋果，在樹蔭里打盹……他愛這棵樹，樹也愛和他一起玩。
隨著時間的流逝，小男孩長大了。他不再到樹旁玩耍了。
一天，男孩回到樹旁，看起來很悲傷。“來和我玩吧！”樹說。
“我不再是小孩了，我不會再到樹下玩耍了。”男孩答到，“我想要玩具，我需要錢來買。”
“很遺憾，我沒有錢……但是你可以采摘我的所有蘋果拿去賣。這樣你就有錢了。”
男孩很興奮。他摘掉樹上所有的蘋果，然后高興地離開了。
自從那以后男孩沒有回來。樹很傷心。
一天，男孩回來了，樹非常興奮。“來和我玩吧。”
樹說。“我沒有時間玩。
我得為我的家庭工作。我們需要一個房子來遮風擋雨，你能幫我嗎？”很遺憾，我沒有房子。
但是，你可以砍下我的樹枝來建房。“因此，男孩砍下所有的樹枝，高高興興地離開了。
看到他高興，樹也很高興。但是，自從那時起男孩沒再出現，樹有孤獨，傷心起來。
突然，在一個夏日，男孩回到樹旁，樹很高興。“來和我玩吧！”樹說。
“我很傷心，我開始老了。我想去航海放松自己。
你能不能給我一條船？” “用我的樹干去造一條船，你就能航海了，你會高興的。”于是，男孩砍倒樹干去造船。
他航海去了，很長一段時間未露面。 許多年后男孩終于回來了。
“很遺憾，我的孩子，我再也沒有任何東西可以給你了。沒有蘋果給你……”樹說。
“我沒有牙齒啃。” 男孩答到。
“沒有樹干供你爬。”“現在我老了，爬不上去了。”
男孩說。“我真的想把一切都給你……我唯一剩下的東西是快要死去的樹墩。”
樹含著眼淚說。“現在，我不需要什么東西，只需要一個地方來休息。
經過了這些年我太累了。”男孩答到。
“太好了！老樹墩就是倚著休息的最好地方。過來，和我一起坐下休息吧。”
男孩坐下了，樹很高興，含淚而笑…… 這是一個發生在每一個人身上的故事。那棵樹就像我們的父母。
我們小的時候，喜歡和爸爸媽媽玩……長大后，便離開他們，只有在我們需要父母親，或是遇到了困難的時候，才會回去找他們。盡管如此，父母卻。
2.需要一篇不超過3分鐘的英語演講稿,要幽默有趣,中英對照
A Young Idler,An Old Beggar Almost everyone knows the famous Chinese saying:A young idler,an old *hout history,we have seen many cases in which this saying has again and again proved to be * goes without saying that the youth is the best time of life,during which one's mental and physical states are at their * takes relatively less time and pains to learn or accept new things in a world full of changes and rapid * addition,one is less likely to be under great pressure from career,family and health problems when *ore,a fresh mind plus enormous energy will ensure success in different aspects of * course,we all know:no pains,no * we don't make every effort to make good use of the advantages youth brings us,it is impossible to achieve any * students,we should now try our best to learn all the subjects well so that we can be well prepared for the challenges that we will face in the future.少壯不努力，老大徒傷悲 幾乎所有人都知道中國有一句老話：少壯不努力，老大徒傷悲.通過閱讀歷史，我們從一個又一個的案例當中得知，這句話被證實是真確的.不用說都知道，在青年時期，人的智力和身體狀況都是一生中最好的，這也是一個人一生中最好的時期.在這個處處都不停地轉變，飛快地發展的世界里，年輕使人相對地用更少的時間去學習和領悟新知.在這時，很少人會困在從事業上來的壓力下，家庭和健康問題也比較小（就是說不是沒有--譯者）.所以，一個清醒的腦袋加上巨大的能量就會成就人生中不同方面的成功.當然，我們都知道：沒有挫折就沒有獲得.如果我們沒有好好努力去利用年輕帶給我們的優勝之處，那就沒有可能獲得任何的成功.作為中學生，我們應該做到最好去學好每一個科目，這樣的話，我們就可以為將來即將面對的挑戰做好準備.。
3.高分求英語幽默的演講稿,比較簡單的,時間要求3分鐘左右
Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.
At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."
它們是從美國直接帶來的
一位中國老婦人在美國看望女兒回來不久，到一家市銀行存女兒送給她的美元。在銀行柜臺，銀行職員認真檢查了每一張鈔票，看是否有假。
An Alarm Clock
A young man went to a mountain village for his holiday. One night he stayed at a small hotel near a train station.
Before going to bed, he went to the owner of the hotel and said to the old man, “ Excuse me, sir. Will you please wake me up at a quarter to five? I'm going to take the five o'clock train tomorrow morning. ”
“ Oh, sorry, ” the owner said, “ I am afraid I can't. I don't get up that early. ”
The young man started to go back to his room when he stopped and asked, “ Do you have an alarm clock? That would help me. ”
“ Yes, here it is, young man. ”
The young man took the clock happily and thanked the old man. But when he looked at it carefully, there appeared to be something wrong with it.
“ Does it ring on time? ” he asked the old man.
“ Sure! Just shake it when it's time to get up, and it'll ring. ”
一只鬧鐘
一個年輕人到一個山村去度假。那天夜里，他住宿在火車站附近的一個旅館里。
上床睡之前，他對旅館老板——一個老頭兒說：“對不起，先生，請問您能在五點差一刻叫醒我嗎？我明天早晨要乘五點的火車。”
“哦，很抱歉”，旅館老板說，“恐怕不行，我不可能起那么早。”
年輕人正想回到房間去，又停住了問：“那你有鬧鐘嗎？或許它能幫助我。”
“我有，給你，年輕人。”
年輕人很高興地拿了鬧鐘，謝了老頭兒。但當他仔細查看了鬧鐘后，發現似乎有毛病。
“它能準時鬧嗎？”他問老頭兒。
“那當然！時間一到，你搖一搖，他就會響的。”
4.給我一篇簡單的長點的幽默點的能演講三分鐘的英文小故事,親們,幫我
The 16 year old girl and her mother said she had already 2 months did not come。
The mother listens to hurry to go to the pharmacy to buy a home pregnancy test to confirm。
The girl really pregnant! The mother cry and scold asked: "what is that you do, you give me to tell the truth!!" The girl had to phone。
Half an hour later, a new Ferrari coupe raced to the girl's family, and step out of the car is a whole body famous brand clothes and graceful bearing of the middle-aged gentleman. A gentleman entered the house and girl and her parents sat down in the living room. Good afternoon. The gentleman politely to their greetings and said: "your 。
1 seaside villas and a $2000000 account to her; "。 The mother listens to hurry to go to the pharmacy to buy a home pregnancy test to confirm;your daughter has just informed me the big problem, 2 housesThe 16 year old girl and her mother said she had already 2 months did not come, and step out of the car is a whole body famous brand clothes and graceful bearing of the middle-aged gentleman: ".".".!", and both hands firmly on the gentleman' At this point in the side silent already a long time of father;s family! The mother cry and scold asked;But if unfortunate abortion, I's shoulders and said. Half an hour later.."Well; The girl had to phone.;what is that you do!。
, stand up suddenly。., I would leave 3 stores., but because of personal family problem for me: ", then each person inherits 1 companies and the $1000000 account. A gentleman entered the house and girl and her parents sat down in the living room.; "." ". The gentleman politely to their greetings and said;If the baby is a boy; ".;t marry your daughter to wife!"., I will let he inherited 2 companies plus the last $2000000 account., a new Ferrari coupe raced to the girl'.. Good afternoon. The girl really pregnant;If the baby is twins, you give me to tell the truth, if the baby is a girl.;m sorry I can', but I will take the responsibility of.。
5.三分鐘幽默英語演講
網上找的比較感人的一篇 單詞很簡單 我一個學生就用這個演講的 發給你看看 三分鐘左右 A Boy and His Tree A long time ago, there was a huge apple tree. A little boy loved to come and play around it every day. He climbed to the tree top, ate the apples, took a nap under the shadow… He loved the tree and the tree loved to play with him. Time went by…The little boy had grown up and he no longer played around the tree. One day, the boy came back to the tree and looked sad. “Come and play with me,” the tree asked the boy. “I am no longer a kid, I don't play around trees anymore.” The boy replied, “I want toys. I need money to buy them.” “Sorry, but I don't have money…but you can pick all my apples and sell them. So, you will have money.” The boy was so excited. He picked all the apples on the tree and left happily. The boy didn't come back after he picked the apples. The tree was sad. One day, the boy returned and the tree was so excited. “Come and play with me.” The tree said. “I don't have time to play. I have to work for my family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?” “Sorry, but I don't have a house. But you can cut off my branches to build your house.” So the boy cut all the branches of the tree and left happily. The tree was glad to see him happy but the boy didn't appear since then. The tree was again lonely and sad. One hot summer day, the boy returned and the tree was delighted. “Come and play with me!” the tree said. “I am sad and getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself. Can you give me a boat?” “Use my trunk to build the boat. You can sail and be happy.” So the boy cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and did not show up for a long time. Finally, the boy returned after he left for so many years. “Sorry, my boy. But I don't have anything for you anymore. No more apples for you.” the tree said. “ I don't have teeth to bite.” The boy replied. “ No more trunk for you to climb on.” “I am too old for that now.” the boy said. “I really want to give you something…the only thing left is my dying roots.” The tree said with tears. “I don't need much now, just a place to rest. I am tired after all these years.” The boy replied. “Good! Old tree roots are the best place to lean on and rest. Come here, please sit down with me and have a rest.” The boy sat down and the tree was glad and smiled with tears… This is a story of everyone. The tree is our parent. When we were young, we loved to play with Mom and Dad… When we grow up, we leave them, and only come to them when we need something or when we are in trouble. No matter what, parents will always be there and give everything they could to make you happy. You may think that the boy is cruel to the tree but that's how all of us are treating our parents. 很久以前有一棵蘋果樹。
一個小男孩每天都喜歡來到樹旁玩耍。他爬到樹頂，吃蘋果，在樹蔭里打盹……他愛這棵樹，樹也愛和他一起玩。
隨著時間的流逝，小男孩長大了。他不再到樹旁玩耍了。
一天，男孩回到樹旁，看起來很悲傷。“來和我玩吧！”樹說。
“我不再是小孩了，我不會再到樹下玩耍了。”男孩答到，“我想要玩具，我需要錢來買。”
“很遺憾，我沒有錢……但是你可以采摘我的所有蘋果拿去賣。這樣你就有錢了。”
男孩很興奮。他摘掉樹上所有的蘋果，然后高興地離開了。
自從那以后男孩沒有回來。樹很傷心。
一天，男孩回來了，樹非常興奮。“來和我玩吧。”
樹說。“我沒有時間玩。
我得為我的家庭工作。我們需要一個房子來遮風擋雨，你能幫我嗎？”很遺憾，我沒有房子。
但是，你可以砍下我的樹枝來建房。“因此，男孩砍下所有的樹枝，高高興興地離開了。
看到他高興，樹也很高興。但是，自從那時起男孩沒再出現，樹有孤獨，傷心起來。
突然，在一個夏日，男孩回到樹旁，樹很高興。“來和我玩吧！”樹說。
“我很傷心，我開始老了。我想去航海放松自己。
你能不能給我一條船？” “用我的樹干去造一條船，你就能航海了，你會高興的。”于是，男孩砍倒樹干去造船。
他航海去了，很長一段時間未露面。 許多年后男孩終于回來了。
“很遺憾，我的孩子，我再也沒有任何東西可以給你了。沒有蘋果給你……”樹說。
“我沒有牙齒啃。” 男孩答到。
“沒有樹干供你爬。”“現在我老了，爬不上去了。”
男孩說。“我真的想把一切都給你……我唯一剩下的東西是快要死去的樹墩。”
樹含著眼淚說。“現在，我不需要什么東西，只需要一個地方來休息。
經過了這些年我太累了。”男孩答到。
“太好了！老樹墩就是倚著休息的最好地方。過來，和我一起坐下休息吧。”
男孩坐下了，樹很高興，含淚而笑…… 這是一個發生在每一個人身上的故事。那棵樹就像我們的父母。
我們小的時候，喜歡和爸爸媽媽玩……長大后，便離開他們。
6.英語三分鐘小演講段子搞笑
A class has come to a new life.
One day, the teacher asked him: how old are you?
Student: Excuse me, where is the teacher asking me?
Teacher: your age.
Student: Oh, excuse me, do you want to know my age or the age of this year?
Teacher: nonsense, certainly this year's pull.
Student: Oh, what is the teacher asked me to tell you now or class to tell you?
Teacher: now.
Student: Oh, excuse me, do you want me to say it aloud or quietly?
Teacher: you say or not! Less flicker me!
Student: Excuse me, why do you want to know how old I am?
Teacher: I just ask not to do?
Student: Well, I don't answer?
Teacher:。
7.求一篇英語的講演稿,要求三分鐘,最好是簡單點,有點幽默
Good News and Bad News
The soldiers had been marching and fighting, they were dirty, hot and tired. One day, the general announced: "My men, I have some good news and some bad news for you. Which one would you like first?"
"The good news!" they all shouted.
"OK," said the General. "The good news is that you will each be receiving a complete change of clothing."
"Hurrah!" chorused the soldiers.
"And now for the bad news. Jack, you will change with John. John, you will change with Tom. Tom, you will change with Robert. Robert 。.
好消息和壞消息
士兵們連續的行軍，作戰，他們又累又熱又臟。一天，將軍宣布： “士兵們，我有一些好消息和壞消息要告訴你們。你們愿意先聽哪個呢？”
“好消息！”他們嚷道。
定海翅剿儼濟愁汐傳摟 “好吧，”將軍說，“好消息就是你們每個人都可以徹底的換一身衣服。”
“烏拉！”士兵們高興地大叫起來。
“現在呢，該是壞消息了。杰克，你將和約翰換衣服，約翰，你和湯姆換，湯姆，你和羅伯特換，羅伯特……”
8.3分鐘英語演講,關于笑話的
Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day? Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go Slow". 湯姆的借口 老師：湯姆，您為什么每天上學遲到？ 湯姆：我每次路過拐角，一個路標上面寫著："學校----慢行。
" DID YOUR DAD HELP YOU? One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all his sums right. The teacher was very pleased-and rather surprised. He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. What happened? Did your father help you?" "No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim. 你爸爸幫你了嗎？ 一天，蒂姆的數學老師看了他的作業，發現他全做對了。老師很高興 ，同時也十分驚訝。
他把蒂姆叫到桌前說："蒂姆，你這次的作業全都 做對了，怎么回事？你爸爸幫你做了嗎？" "不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做了。" 英語幽默笑話Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!" and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)！" 湯姆對著吉姆罵道："我受不了你這個苯蛋了！" 吉姆說："你媽媽能！" 附：bear 有兩重意思："生"和"忍受"這個笑話正是根據這點. Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!" and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)！" 湯姆對著吉姆罵道："我受不了你這個苯蛋了！" 吉姆說："你媽媽能！" 附：bear 有兩重意思："生"和"忍受"這個笑話正是根據這點. 圣誕節英語笑話Peace and love for you at Christmas from all your students. 祝老師圣誕節充滿平安和愛。
Wishing you a sparkling Christmas and bright happy New Year! May the season bring much pleasure to you. 愿你的圣誕光彩奪目，愿你的新年燦爛輝煌！佳節快樂！ Wishing you all the blessings of a beautiful Christmas season. 愿你擁有圣誕節所有美好的祝福。 Wishing you all the happiness of the holiday season. 祝節日幸福如意。
Hope all your Christmas dreams come true！ 愿你所有的圣誕夢想都成真！ 英語短笑話一：She Didn"t Say Anything A mother and son were washing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the room. Suddenly, there was a crash of breaking dishes, then complete silence. The girl looked at her father and said, “It was Mom”。 “How do you know?” asked her father. “She didn"t sayanything.” 二：I Have Turned It Over A woman said to her husband, “dear, look at our sheet! It"s too dirty. Would you like to wash it now?” The man looked at the sheet and then thought for a while and then said, “I don"t think it"s necessary. We can turn the sheet over. Is that all right？” 英語四級笑話一婦女經常光顧一家古董店，但幾乎從不買什么東西，卻總是對商品和價格吹毛求疵。
對于那婦女的粗暴抱怨，經理和她的銷售員總是應付了事，但是有一天她做得太過分了。“為什么你們店里總是不能得到我想要的東西？”那名婦女指責說。
職員臉上帶著微笑，沉著地回答道：“也許是因為我們太有禮貌了。” A woman who frequented a small antique shop rarely purchase anything, but always found fault with the merchandise and prices. The manager and her salesclerk took the woman's grumpy complaints in stride, but one day she went too far. "Why is it I never manage to get what I ask for in your shop?" demanded the woman. U %o= +Gc ]h:,.KMu。
9.給我一篇簡單的長點的幽默點的能演講三分鐘的英文小故事,親們,幫
The 16 year old girl and her mother said she had already 2 months did not come。
The mother listens to hurry to go to the pharmacy to buy a home pregnancy test to confirm。
The girl really pregnant! The mother cry and scold asked: "what is that you do, you give me to tell the truth!!" The girl had to phone。
Half an hour later, a new Ferrari coupe raced to the girl's family, and step out of the car is a whole body famous brand clothes and graceful bearing of the middle-aged gentleman. A gentleman entered the house and girl and her parents sat down in the living room. Good afternoon. The gentleman politely to their greetings and said: "your 。
1 seaside villas and a $2000000 account to her; "。 The mother listens to hurry to go to the pharmacy to buy a home pregnancy test to confirm;your daughter has just informed me the big problem, 2 housesThe 16 year old girl and her mother said she had already 2 months did not come, and step out of the car is a whole body famous brand clothes and graceful bearing of the middle-aged gentleman: ".".".!", and both hands firmly on the gentleman' At this point in the side silent already a long time of father;s family! The mother cry and scold asked;But if unfortunate abortion, I's shoulders and said. Half an hour later.."Well; The girl had to phone.;what is that you do!。
, stand up suddenly。., I would leave 3 stores., but because of personal family problem for me: ", then each person inherits 1 companies and the $1000000 account. A gentleman entered the house and girl and her parents sat down in the living room.; "." ". The gentleman politely to their greetings and said;If the baby is a boy; ".;t marry your daughter to wife!"., I will let he inherited 2 companies plus the last $2000000 account., a new Ferrari coupe raced to the girl'.. Good afternoon. The girl really pregnant;If the baby is twins, you give me to tell the truth, if the baby is a girl.;m sorry I can', but I will take the responsibility of.。
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