華閱文章網1.求英文幽默簡短的句子
The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn?
Your future depends on your dreams. So go to sleep. <；強推>
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa. <；強推這句>
Hard work never killed anybody. But why take the risk?
Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.
夠暸嗎？
2.英語幽默短句
1) I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
我愛你，不是因為你是一個怎樣的人，而是因為我喜歡與你在一起時的感覺。
2) No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.
沒有人值得你流淚，值得讓你這么做的人不會讓你哭泣。
3) The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
失去某人，最糟糕的莫過于，他近在身旁，卻猶如遠在天邊。
4) Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
縱然傷心，也不要愁眉不展，因為你不知是誰會愛上你的笑容。
5) To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
對于世界而言，你是一個人；但是對于某個人，你是他的整個世界。
6) Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
不要為那些不愿在你身上花費時間的人而浪費你的時間。
7) Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
愛你的人如果沒有按你所希望的方式來愛你，那并不代表他們沒有全心全意地愛你。
8) Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
不要著急，最好的總會在最不經意的時候出現。
9) Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
在遇到夢中人之前，上天也許會安排我們先遇到別的人；在我們終于遇見心儀的人時，便應當心存感激。
10) Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
不要因為結束而哭泣，微笑吧，為你的曾經擁有。
3.非常幽默的英語小笑話（不超過150個單詞）
He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他贏了 湯姆：約翰尼，你小弟弟好嗎？ 約翰尼：他害病臥床了。
他受了傷。 湯姆：真糟糕，怎么回事兒？ 約翰尼：我們做游戲，看誰能把身子探出窗外最遠，他贏了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流著血回到家里。他媽媽問，“發生了什么事？” “一個男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡說。
“再見到他你能認出來嗎？”媽媽問。 “他走到哪里我都能認出他，”伊凡說。
“他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。” A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
“昨天給你的錢干什么了？” “我給了一個可憐的老太婆，”他回答說。 “你真是個好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說。
“再給你兩分錢。可你為什么對那位老太太那么感興趣呢？” “她是個賣糖果的。”
英語小笑話 上個星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球， 一個老美看到就笑我說， "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 性， 縮寫正好是 Adidas） " 我正驚訝他怎么反應這么快， 聯想力這么豐富時，旁邊的 一個老美幫我解圍， 他說， 有一個很著名的合唱團 Korn， 他們的招牌歌之一就是 A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢，這個典故可是很多老美都耳熟 能詳的喔！ 下次就換你去取笑老美了 Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman！" 醉酒 一天，父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處于那種對什么事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。
他向父親發問道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父親回答說，“你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那么我就算醉了。”
“可是，爸爸， ”孩子說，“那兒只有一個警察呀！”。
4.有趣搞笑的英語句子
Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa.
鈔票不是萬能的，有時還需要信用卡。
One should love animals. They are so tasty.
每個人都應該熱愛動物，因為它們很好吃。
Save water. Shower with your girlfriend.
要節約用水，盡量和女友一起洗澡。
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
每個成功男人的背后，都有一個女人。每個不成功男人的背后，都有兩個。
Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
再快樂的單身漢遲早也會結婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。
The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise.
聰明人都是未婚的，結婚的人很難再聰明起來。
Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.
成功是一個相關名詞，他會給你帶來很多不相關的親戚（聯系）。
Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.
愛情就象照片，需要大量的暗房時間來培養。 （老外也保守，要摸黑辦事，哈哈）
Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children.
后排座位上的小孩會生出意外，后排座位上的意外會生出小孩。
"Your future depends on your dreams." So go to sleep.
“現在的夢想決定著你的將來”，所以還是再睡一會吧。
There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.
應該有更好的方式開始新一天，而不是千篇一律的在每個上午都醒來。
"Hard work never killed anybody." But why take the risk? "
“努力工作不會導致死亡！”不過我不會用自己去證明。
"Work fascinates me." I can look at it for hours! "
“工作好有意思耶！”尤其是看著別人工作。
God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends.
神決定了誰是你的親戚，幸運的是在選擇朋友方面他給了你留了余地。
When two's company, three's the result!
兩個人的狀態是不穩定的，三個人才是！
A dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view.
服飾就象鐵絲網，它阻止你貿然行動但并不妨礙你盡情的觀看。
The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget.
The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn.
學的越多，知道的越多，知道的越多，忘記的越多，
忘記的越多，知道的越少，為什么學來著？
5.求英文經典句子
最美的十大經典愛情句子 1) I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you. 我愛你，不是因為你是一個怎樣的人，而是因為我喜歡與你在一起時的感覺。
2) No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry. 沒有人值得你流淚，值得讓你這么做的人不會讓你哭泣。 3) The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them. 失去某人，最糟糕的莫過于，他近在身旁，卻猶如遠在天邊。
4) Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile. 縱然傷心，也不要愁眉不展，因為你不知是誰會愛上你的笑容。 5) To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. 對于世界而言，你是一個人；但是對于某個人，你是他的整個世界。
6) Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you. 不要為那些不愿在你身上花費時間的人而浪費你的時間。 7) Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. 愛你的人如果沒有按你所希望的方式來愛你，那并不代表他們沒有全心全意地愛你。
8) Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to. 不要著急，最好的總會在最不經意的時候出現。 9) Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful. 在遇到夢中人之前，上天也許會安排我們先遇到別的人；在我們終于遇見心儀的人時，便應當心存感激。
10) Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened. 不要因為結束而哭泣，微笑吧，為你的曾經擁有。 經典搞笑的英語句子 1)Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa. 鈔票不是萬能的，有時還需要信用卡. 2)One should love animals. They are so tasty. 每個人都應該熱愛動物，因為它們很好吃. 3)Save water. Shower with your girlfriend. 要節約用水，盡量和女友一起洗澡. 4)Love the neighbor. But don't get caught. 要用心去愛你的鄰居，不過不要讓她的老公知道. 5)Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. 每個成功男人的背后，都有一個女人. 每個不成功男人的背后， 都有兩個女人。
6)Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life. 再快樂的單身漢遲早也會結婚，幸福不是永久的嘛. 7)The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise. 聰明人都是未婚的，結婚的人很難再聰明起來. 8)Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives. 成功是一個相關名詞，他會給你帶來很多不相關的親戚（聯系）. 9)Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today. 不要等明天交不上差再找借口， 今天就要找好. 10)Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children. 后排座位上的小孩會生出意外， 后排座位上的意外會生出小孩. 11)“Your future depends on your dreams.“ So go to sleep. “現在的夢想決定著你的將來“，所以還是再睡一會吧. 12)There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning. 應該有更好的方式開始新一天，而不是千篇一律的在每個上午都醒來. 13)“Hard work never killed anybody.“ But why take the risk？ “ 努力工作不會導致死亡！“不過我不會用自己去證明. 14)“Work fascinates me.“ I can look at it for hours！ “ 工作好有意思耶！“尤其是看著別人工作. 15)When two's company, three's the result！ 兩個人的狀態是不穩定的，三個人才是！ 16)The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn. 學的越多，知道的越多， 知道的越多，忘記的越多， 忘記的越多，知道的越少， 為什么學來著？。
6.搞笑的英語句子翻譯
一、幽默的英語句子 1) Money is not everything. There's Mastercard & Visa. 鈔票不是萬能的，有時還需要信用卡。
2) One should love animals. They are so tasty. 每個人都應該熱愛動物，因為它們很好吃。 3)Save water. Shower with your girlfriend. 要節約用水，盡量和女友一起洗澡。
4)Love the neighbor. But don't get caught. 要用心去愛你的鄰居，不過不要讓她的老公知道。 5)Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. 每個成功男人的背后，都有一個女人。
每個不成功男人的背后，都有兩個。 6)Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life. 再快樂的單身漢遲早也會結婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。
7)The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise. 聰明人都是未婚的，結婚的人很難再聰明起來。 8)Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives. 成功是一個相關名詞，他會給你帶來很多不相關的親戚（聯系）。
9)Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today. 不要等明天交不上差再找借口，今天就要找好。 10)Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop. 愛情就象照片，需要大量的暗房時間來培養。
（老外也保守，要摸黑辦事，哈哈） 11)Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children. 后排座位上的小孩會生出意外，后排座位上的意外會生出小孩。 12)"Your future depends on your dreams." So go to sleep. "現在的夢想決定著你的將來"，所以還是再睡一會吧。
13)There should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning. 應該有更好的方式開始新一天，而不是千篇一律的在每個上午都醒來。 14)"Hard work never killed anybody." But why take the risk？ " "努力工作不會導致死亡！"不過我不會用自己去證明。
15)"Work fascinates me." I can look at it for hours！ " "工作好有意思耶！"尤其是看著別人工作。 16)God made relatives; Thank God we can choose our friends. 神決定了誰是你的親戚，幸運的是在選擇朋友方面他給了你留了余地。
17)When two's company, three's the result！ 兩個人的狀態是不穩定的，三個人才是！ 18)A dress is like a barbed fence. It protects the premises without restricting the view. 服飾就象鐵絲網，它阻止你冒然行動但并不妨礙你盡情的觀看。 19)The more you learn, the more you know, The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother to learn. 學的越多，知道的越多，知道的越多，忘記的越多，忘記的越多，知道的越少，為什么學來著？ 二、勵志的英語句子 * man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry. 沒有人值得你流淚，值得讓你這么做的人不會讓你哭泣。
* you fail, don't forget to learn your lesson. 如果你失敗了，千萬別忘了汲取教訓。 *'t waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you. 不要為那些不愿在你身上花費時間的人而浪費你的時間 * a noble and honest life. Reviving past times in your old age will help you to enjoy your life again. 過一種高尚而誠實的生活。
當你年老時回想起過去，你就能再一次享受人生。 * the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. 對于世界而言，你是一個人；但是對于某個人，你是他的整個世界。
* judge people by their appearance. 永遠不要以貌取人。 *'t try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to. 不要著急，最好的總會在最不經意的時候出現。
*er the best love is to love others unconditionally rather than make demands on them. 記住：最好的愛存在于對別人的愛勝于對別人的索求之上。 * your crystal goblets. Do not save your best perfume, and use it every time you feel you want it. 舉起你的酒杯吧。
不要吝嗇灑上你最好的香水，你想用的時候就享用吧！ * for knowledge, read more, sit on your front porch and admire the view without paying attention to your needs. 尋找更多的知識，多讀一些書，坐在你家的前廊里，以贊美的眼光去享受眼前的風景，不要帶上任何功利的想法。 * yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you. 在你想了解別人也想讓別人了解你之前，先完善并了解自己。
* not keep anything for a special occasion, because every day that you live is a SPECIAL OCCASION. 不要將你的東西為了某一個特別的時刻而預留著，因為你生活的每一天都是那么特別。 * frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile. 縱然傷心，也不要愁眉不展，因為你不知是誰會愛上你的笑容。
14."There are only two creatures," says a proverb, "who can surmount the pyramids-the eagle and the snail." 俗話說：“能登上金字塔的。
7.搞笑的英語句子
老媽叫我翻譯！！！（超強爆笑）
今天我正在看碟，老媽又捧了本書進來，說道：給我講講這幾句話什么意思
老媽：這個“i don't know.“是什么意思？
我說：“我不知道”
老媽：送你上大學上了幾年，你怎么什么都不知道！！
我說：不是！就是“我不知道”嗎！
老媽：還嘴硬！！！！$@%！#$^&%#$%@$%@#$%！^%^！^%$^#&..（一頓爆揍）
老媽：你在給我說說這個。“i know.“是什么意思你該知道吧，給我說說。
我說：是“我知道“
老媽：知道就快說。
我說：就是“我知道“
老媽：找茬呀你？剛才收拾你收拾的輕了是不？
我說：就是我知道呀！
老媽：知道你還不說！！不懂不要裝懂！&*$%^@$#！%$@^%#*$^^^##$%（又一頓爆揍）
老媽：你給我小心點，花那么多錢送你上大學，搞的現在什么都不會，會那么一丁點東西還跟老娘擺譜，再問你最后一個，你給我好好解釋一下，說不出來我在收拾你，你給我翻譯一下“i know but i don't want to tell you.“是什么意思？
我暈倒，拿起枕頭往頭上爆砸三十幾下，用頭撞墻四十多下，雙手輪番抽自己嘴巴五十多下，用腿踢桌子角六十多下，血肉模糊之時，我問老媽：這下你滿意吧
這不她老人家又來問我了：“兒啊，i`m very annoyance,don`t tuouble me .是什么意思啊~？“
我：“我很煩，別煩我“
老媽：“找打，跟你媽這么說話“（于是被扁）
老媽又問；“i hear nothing,repeat. 是what意思啊“
我說：“我沒聽清，再說一次“
老媽又說了一遍：i hear nothing,repeat“
“我沒聽清，再說一次“
結果被扁
老媽再問：“what do you say “又怎么解釋呢“
我說：“你說什么“（再次被扁）
老媽再問：“look up in the dictionary“是何意啊'
我說：“查字典“
“查字典我還問你做甚“（被扁）
老媽又問：you had better ask some body.怎么翻呢“
我說：“你最好問別人“
“你是我兒子，我問別人干嗎，又找打.“
“啊！god save me !“
“上帝救救我吧！”
“耍你老媽玩，上帝也救不了你！（被扁）
我再問你：“use you head,then think it over，又是什么意思啊！“
我說：“動動腦子，再仔細想想.“
“臭小子，還敢耍我“接著又要動手
我連忙說：“是世上只有媽媽好的意思”
“嗯，這還差不多，一會我給你做好吃的，明天再問你”
8.【求：一些簡單有趣的英語一詞多義的句子,比如.Aflyeanfly.蒼蠅會
英語中最最有趣的句子 1. Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you. 麻煩沒來找你，就別去自找麻煩. 第一、四個trouble是動詞，第二、三個trouble是名詞. 2. I think that that that that that student wrote on the blackboard was wrong. 我認為那個學生寫在黑板上的那個“that”是錯誤的. 第一個that是連詞，引起賓語從句；第二、五個that是指示代詞“那個”；第三個that在這兒相當于名詞；第四個that是關系代詞，引起定語從句. 3. I know. You know. I know that you know. I know that you know that I know. 我知道.你知道.我知道你知道.我知道你知道我知道. 4. We must hang together, or we'll be hanged separately. 我們必須團結在一起，否則我們將被一個個絞死. 這是一句雙關語.前面的hang together是“團結一致”的意思，后面的hanged是“絞死”的意思. 5. The quick brown fox jumps over a lazy dog. 那只敏捷的棕色狐貍跳過了一只懶惰的狗. 這個句子包含了英語中的26個字母. 6. Was it a bar or a bat I saw？ 我看到的是酒吧還是蝙蝠？ 這是一句回文句，順著讀和倒著讀是一樣的. 7. 上聯： To China for china, China with china, dinner on china. 去中國買瓷器，中國有瓷器，吃飯靠瓷器. 下聯：到前門買前門，前門沒前門，后門有前門. 這是一副對仗工整、妙趣橫生的英漢對聯.下聯中的第二、四、五個“前門”指“大前門”香煙. 8. 2B or not 2B, that is a ？ 這是一種文字簡化游戲.它的意思是：To be or not to be, that is a question. （生存還是毀滅，那是一個問題.）。
