華閱文章網1.求搞笑的英語話劇劇本 至少十分鐘 五人或以上 要中英對照
我從Arnold Lobel的小故事"Cookies"找到靈感，寫下這段對話.感覺挺有意義的. Will power意志力 Mike(M) Danny(C), Tommy(T)-classmates 地點：Scene- in the college dorm大學宿舍 Danny is playing a computer game on his laptop. Tommy is sleeping. Mike came back from a morning jogging. M: hi, Dan, what are u doing? D: I am playing war craft. M: Where is Tommy? D: Shi ! M:What? What's the matter? D: Don't u see? He is still sleeping. M: My goodness! I can't believe this! It's almost nine. He got to get up now. Don't u remember we are required to make up a three people dialogue for tomorrow's oral class? D: Yes, I do. You wake up Tommy and I will play one more round of war craft. M: You'd better stop playing right now. We don't have much time to prepare this dialogue. Tommy! Tommy! Wake up! Time to wake up! T:five more minutes, please. Mike: No way, Jose. Time really * still have a lot to do. Hurry up. T: (Tommy sits up in his bed) Can I lie down two more minutes, please, just two more minutes? when Danny finishes his game, I will be fine.(Yawns) I don't know why I am so so sleepy. (Tommy lies down again.) M: Guys! I am really angry now. Time waits for nobody. If you two don't stop what you are doing now, I will find somebody else to be my partners. D and T: all right. All right. We listen to u. M: That's more like it. We need will power. D and T: what is will power? M: Will power is trying hard not to do something that you really want to do. D: You mean like trying not to play war craft? Mike: right. T: you mean like trying not to stay up late? M: right. Danny turns off his computer. Tommy gets up and goes to the bathroom. Two minutes later the three maskeetters are working on their assignment. Danny: Mike, can I take a little break? Let me play one round and we will continue our work? Tommy: Mike, Can I lie down a minute? My back hurts. Mike: Noo ! Let's finish our work first before we do other things. We need Will Power! Danny and Tommy: that's true. We need Will Power! We listen to you. Ok. Let's go! The end。
2.搞笑英語話劇短一點的,配中文
英語搞笑話劇劇本-A Story about Love and Stinky Feet 從前，一個巫婆有一雙臭腳，人們都很討厭。
所以，她想找一個人換掉她的雙腳。 有一天她來到"香國" 。
她發現，人人都有雙香腳。一天王子午睡，巫婆用自己的臭腳換了王子的香腳。
有一位公主，她總是失眠。雖然國王和王后在嘗試了很多方法，她還不能睡覺。
國王和王后陛下非常擔心自己的女兒。 最后，他們就發現了一個方法：每當公主無法入睡，她只需要嗅覺王子的臭腳，然后她將睡得很好。
最后王子和公主很幸福的生活在一起。人物 Ada: Little girl Candy: Queen Evander: King Evelyn Joel: Prince Rita: Singer /Woman Yilina: Witch Summary Once upon a time…A witch had a pair of stinky feet. They were very disgusting. So, she wanted to find a person to change her * one day she flied to “Fragrance Country”. She found everyone there had a pair of fragrant feet. And the prince had the most fragrant pair of feet. The prince took a nap and snored under the tree. At that time, the witch exchanged her own stinky feet with the prince's fragrant * was a princess who couldn't sleep in “Beauty Country”. Although the king and the queen tried many methods, she still couldn't sleep. The king and the queen were very worried about their * then, they discovered a perfect method for the princess to fall asleep: Whenever the princess couldn't sleep, she only had to smell the prince's stinky feet, and then she would sleep very well. In the end, the prince and the princess lived happily * I(One afternoon, a girl, Ada, is reading a book) Ada: Oh~ what an interesting story! Once upon a time…A witch had a pair of stinky feet. They smelt worse than stinky tofu. They were very disgusting. So, she wanted to find a person to change her *: And one day she flied to “Fragrance country”. She found everyone there had a pair of fragrant feet. And the prince had the most fragrant pair of feet. The prince took a nap and snored under the *: (screaming and laughing and dancing)I'm the most perfect witch who has both beauty and intelligence. More and more people fall for my…my … feet! Oh no, my feet! I'm such a charming witch, but why do my feet stink so much? Everyone faints when they smell my feet. The smell of my feet can kill mice. Oh, I don't want to live. I want to fly away!(Flying to the Fragrance country) Witch: (Crying) I hate my feet! I hate my feet! (in a low voice) Ha-ha, what's the smell? It smells so sweet. (Searching) Oh. What a handsome boy. (Come closer and take a deep breath) Oh, oh, oh, why do his feet have such a sweet smell? It's just not fair! (Angrily) Not fair! Look, he's sleeping and snoring. Let me exchange my feet with his! (Doing magic and laughing loudly) Oh, my feet. You smell so sweet! Now I'm really the most charming witch. (Fly away) Prince: (Asleep and dreaming) Oh! What a beautiful girl you are! You are my only one – my dear *: (Wake up!) Oh~ what's wrong? What a bad smell!! The room smells of stinky tofu. Is it my table? My hand? My chair? My head? Or my window? Oh no! It's my feet. I have a pair of stinky feet. How did it happen? (Hold on to his head.)(Run away) I can't believe it!。
3.誰能提供一個短篇英文劇本,要搞笑的
。焦仲卿johnny(jforshort)
劉蘭芝lunch(lforshort)
焦母johnny's mother(jmforshort)
劉母lunch's mother(lmforshort)
太守之子mayor'sson(msforshort)
強盜burglars(abandc)
prologue 序幕
(j作被打狀跑上臺，內砸出一卷紙筒，j被打中，狼狽不堪)
j:everybody says that i'm hen pecked, but in fact,i'm a strong tiger，（小聲）while my
wife is wusong.
譯：人人都說我怕老婆，實際上我是老虎，（小聲）我妻子是武松。
（指著上臺處的門大聲道）i'm not afraid of you!
譯：我才不怕你呢！
（內砸出一臉盆，j接住當成盾牌護著頭）then, i'm afraid of whom! my wife lunchi is the most famous woman in the * is braver than me,smarter than me and stronger than me .all this i donot care. i only want she to be tender than me. but she is not! having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!
譯：誰怕誰啊！在鄰里中，我妻子是最有名氣的。她比我勇敢、比我聰明、比我強壯。我也不在乎這些。我只覺得她該對我溫柔些，但是她卻不懂溫柔！有這樣的太太就像活在地獄中啊！
（內又砸出一卷紙筒，擊中j）
my god! who can help me？（下）
譯：我的天！誰來救救我啊？
act1 第一幕
（序幕結束時，jm作竊聽狀）
jm（拄拐棍上）：i can!
（對門內）lunch! lunch! where are you?
l（扎著圍裙，拿著鍋鏟，從門內跳出來）：i'm here! what's up ,mum?
jm:i have told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother in law”.
l:* most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what's up?
jm:since you married my son you have be havedso * have been so rude, so brusque,so
lazy……
l:but……
jm:never interrupt me!
l:never interrupt me! since i married your son, that terrible johnny,i have been working hard all
daylong,cooking and washing. i have raised tens of thousands of pigs and ducks and chicken
and……
jm:but all those you have done arenot asvaluable as a grandson!
l（生氣地揮動著鍋鏟）：oh,you want a grandson,don't you？（開始解圍裙）go and ask your son. i'm leaving！（扯下圍裙，扔在jm的臉上，下）
4.2人英語簡短搞笑劇本
(At Salesman's home)
N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He is coming!
S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I'm the famous candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very popular，（展示），I don't know why. The foolish students always come here. I'll be a boss soon! Candy, money, candy, money……
Oops! It's time to make candies now.（看表）
First, put the flour on the table.
Then, water, sugar, flour.（邊說邊做）
Now press, press……
Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it！（滿不在意的神情）
Press, press……
Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it!
Press, press, the children will not know it , it's OK,hehehe……
Now let me cut it into pieces!
5.英語幽默短劇劇本 帶翻譯
旁白（Aside ）/介紹（Introduction）: Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. 在很久很久以前，有個瘋狂的國度住著一群瘋狂的人，用瘋狂的方式給人們講述著瘋狂的故事。
o（∩_∩）o。哈哈Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth. 聞名遐邇的刀客，荊軻先生，被委以刺殺秦始皇嬴政的任務。
但最終還是失敗鳥。你想知道當時的情形如何嗎？好，下面的我們將給你呈現當時真實的一幕。
Action I 太子丹（上，掏出鏡子梳頭，做自戀狀）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world？ （畫外音：It's you, Prince Dan！ 太子丹高興狀） Thank u mirror！ （面對觀眾） I'm Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do？ （向幕里大叫） Where is my minister？ 太子丹（上，掏出鏡子梳頭，做自戀狀）：魔鏡魔鏡告訴我，天下男人誰最美？ （畫外音：是你是你太子丹 太子丹高興狀） 非常感謝，我的魔鏡 （面對觀眾） 我是太子丹，魔鏡告訴我說我是天下最美的男人 但是嬴政老小子嫉妒于我，倘若給他從魔鏡那兒得知了真相，必要追殺于我 。太可怕了，我該咋辦啦？ （向幕里大叫） 我的小弟們呢，哪兒去了？ 阿三（畢恭畢敬） ： Honey, I am coming 親耐滴老大，我來也。
太子丹：I've told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”！我怎么告訴你的，以后見到我要喊“我最最漂亮，瀟灑，帥氣，和藹，可愛，機靈和尊敬的太子丹殿下”，你又忘了！阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作殺狀）了解，親耐滴！我有個好主意。我們找個大英雄去刺殺嬴政。
太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent！（二十一世紀最需要的是什么，人才！這句話要跟觀眾交流，最好由觀眾來回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做贊許狀） Good idea! But who is the right candidate？妙計！那么誰是最佳人選捏？阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.眼下我有倆在冊人手，一個名曰李莫愁，另一個便是荊軻。明天他們講通過PK來角逐最佳殺手稱號！太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK？那行，動作要快，ok？阿三：Yes.著。
6.搞笑英語話劇劇本
搞笑7人劇本《西門吹雪與葉孤城》演員表：西門吹雪、葉孤城、花滿樓、king、路人、上官雪兒 旁白 道具：牛奶兩袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，紙屑若干。
第一幕：決戰紫荊城之顛 旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow .Birds are dancing in the cold .A man is walking along the street ,step by step .Wind is coming in *r mysterious man approaches .Y與X相遇. X:oH ,I am sorry to knock you !Y:, Never mind baby.X:Excuse me, who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name?Y:,I won't change my name! no matter what happens. I'm the most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you?X:Iamximenchuixue.Y驚訝：Ar, ximenchui xue?the best MartialArts?X:Great, you know me !Today is your dead date!Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don't kill me! Let me go!X:No, I must kill you !Y:I don't want to be killed. There are a eighty-year-old mother and a three-year old son to be looked after by me!X:No way! Because we are fighting now ! you know ?Y突然站起冷冷的說：Don't force me!X:Pardon!(Y拿出一袋牛奶) X搶過牛奶：milk, very good ! I like drinking it. How do you know that?Y:please drink it!X喝完牛奶：Thanks,Y:Do you still want to kill me ?X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.Y（惱怒+冷酷）：Very good ! very good ! I hope you will not forget what you said!?X:I'm sure I won't!Y:I must give you a lesson ! If I don't beat you this time, you'll never behave properly ! 3-2-1!X捂著肚子，蹲下（做痛苦狀）：Oach,Oach !Y大笑：HaHa……the milk is exceed the time limit （一人路過，x起身跑過去） X可憐狀： excuse me! Help , help , Where is the washroom?please ,tell me .Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see a corssing road!X:Thanks,byebye.Y:byebye （以勝利者的語氣，轉頭，看見 花滿樓） Y:Who are you?H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC” .H驚訝：Now you are the best in the world !Y:You are right !H:Teriffic ! you are the one my king looking for ! do you want join in us? If you follow my king,he will give what you want.Y:Yes,It's very good.H:Ok, follow me, Let's go to see my king！第二幕：無間道 H:My dearest ! let me introduce yegucheng to you！ （指Y） this is yegucheng.K:sit down plese, yegucheng.Y:excuse me,I have a * you give me what I want just if I follow you?King:yes,I will.Y:That's good. Can you give me a MM ?K:of * are the one who has the similar taste with me! Hahaha…… Y:of course.美女出場 M:hello，帥鍋..K: this is *,now let's have a ritual.H走到Y前，《婚禮進行曲》起，H神甫狀：Yegucheng! Do you want to follow my king no matter what happens such as cold headache , poor ,rich?Y: Yes,I do.K: Huamanlou, come . put the ring on his finger！（音樂停） X唱著上：（看到戒指） this ring should be mine!K:But who are you ? why should it belong to you?Y急切： king! Dear king ! I must go now , my brother is looking for me.X冷酷：yegucheng! Come here ! I want to tell you something!Y抱X的腿：old brother ! Forgive me!X:Forgive you? Why ?Y: Once there was a chance before me , I lost it . If the god give me another chance, I'll tell you “ I love you ” , If the remustbea limited period,I hope it is thousand year!X:You shall cheat me ! all you did are wrong ! how can you tell me the lady's “WC”!Y:I like going lady's WC .I……I……I think that you like what I like.(Y又拿出一袋牛奶) X:milk?I love you.K:Don't say that “you love me”. I'll kill you for you saying dirty word to me !X:What？ （側耳裝著聽不到） You—kill—-me?come, come…（X上去抓住K） K:Fuck you. I must kill you!X:How can you kill me? haha…… Y:Let me have a try! 3-2-1(X捂著肚子，蹲下) M: oh,what happened？（看著X，做驚嚇狀）are you ok？（跑到西門吹雪身邊） Y :do you want to go to wc?X:Yes,I……I…… do.Y:haha, the milk was added 三聚氰胺 beyond standards.M: you , stupid , bad behavior ! go away ! K; why ? why do you help him ! who actually are you ?M: actually,I'm a spy sended by LuXiaofeng,and I fell in love with ximenchuixue.K驚訝： ！you—you—You are X'lover?Y: do you know, you are the first person who cheated me ! I hate you .（輕聲說）let me tell you,Xwill die.M撲倒在X的身邊：X,do't die ,you should be alive ,there are much hope in the future and tomorrow is a good beginning !K:what a moving story ! I was impressed !Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume !M: life is a progress ,and it is delight that it needn't resume !(M忽然將一把匕首插進Y的心臟，K嚇跑.音樂《再見，警察》起) Y痛苦狀：I never anticipate you treat me by this ,why?tell me why?(Y死，音樂停) （X咳，H撲到身邊，電影《我的父。
7.英語劇本,帶翻譯的,搞笑,短一些,3個人演
校園小品劇本：搞笑幽默相聲小品短劇本臺詞 校園小品 人物：團支書，小艾，小玲，小伍 場景：教室 團支書：同學們，同窗們，同志們，同胞們，同。
同。
同什么們！請大家聽我說一句！ 三人：說吧。
團支書：你們聽不聽啊？ 三人：聽著呢！ 團支書：真的聽？ 三人：真的！ 團支書：確定？ 三人：確定。 團支書：不反悔？ 三人：不反悔。
團支書：你們是認真的？沒騙我？ 三人：你說不說啊？ 團支書：噢，我開始說了！----我要說什么來的？ 三人暈倒。 團支書：啊！！！！對了！ 三人坐起。
團支書：我真的忘了我要說什么！ 三人又暈倒。 團支書：好了，言歸傳正，你們再不能醉死夢生了！你們一定要自強不息，自告奮勇，自，自，自。
好好改過，抵制日貨！ 小玲：這都什么亂七八糟的！ 團支書：小玲！你為什么上課要睡覺？ 小玲：我困故我睡！ 團支書：你為什么不在宿舍睡？ 小玲：我也想啊！可老師不讓走！ 團支書：你就不能下課睡？ 小玲：我下課了也睡！ 團支書：那你晚上做什么？ 小玲：你晚上做什么？ 團支書：睡覺啊！ 小玲：我們這個習性一樣！ 團支書：你除了睡覺還做什么？ 小玲：很重要的事！----吃飯 2009-3-6薦 小品：相聲下載|小品：搞笑臺詞|小品：二人轉|小品：非誠勿擾|小品：傻子上學 Campus sketch script: funny humorous short crosstalk sketch script lines Campus sketch Characters: competitive person, little moxa, xiao ling, xiao wu Scene: the classroom Competitive person: the classmates, classmates, comrades, fellow citizens, with。With。
With what!Please listen to me say! Three people: go ahead. Competitive person: do you listen to? Three people: listening! Competitive person: really? Three people: really! Competitive person: sure? Three people: sure. Competitive person: don't go back on our word? Three people: don't go back on our word. Competitive person: are you serious?Don't lie to me? Three: you speak? Competitive person: oh, I began to say!- what do I say? Three people fainted. Competitive person: ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Right! Three people sitting up. Competitive person, I really forgot what I say! Three people fainted again. Competitive person: ok, return to preach is, you can no longer drunk death dream life!You must be unyielding, volunteered, since, since, since。Good good rehabilitation, boycott Japanese goods! Xiaoling: what is this mess! Competitive person: xiao ling!!!Why are you in class to go to sleep? Xiaoling: I'm sleepy I sleep! Competitive person: why don't you sleep dormitory? Xiaoling: I also want to!But the teacher won't let go! Competitive person: can't you go sleep? Xiaoling: class is over I also sleep! Competitive person: what you do at night? Xiaoling: what are you doing at night? A competitive person: go to bed! Xiaoling: our habits! Competitive person: what do you do in addition to sleep? Xiaoling: very important!Eating - The 2009-3-6 recommendation Download: crosstalk | sketch: funny lines | sketch: the men | sketch: if you are the one | sketch: a fool to go to school。
8.急求搞笑的英語話劇劇本
大話西游的…… Once,I let a true love slip away before my * to find myself regretting when it was too late. Nothing in the world can be as painful as * let your sword cut into my throat! Don't hesitate. If the god would give me another chance. I would tell the girl I love her. If our love had to have a time limit., I wish it would be 10,000 years！ 曾經有一份真摯的感情放在我的面前，但我卻沒有去珍惜，如果上天再給 我一次機會，我一定會對她說，我愛你，如果非要給這愛加上一個期限的話 ，那就是一萬年。
大話西游 A Chinese Odyssey 至尊寶：長夜漫漫無心睡眠，我以為只有我睡不著覺，原來晶晶姑娘你也睡不著啊！ It's long night,no mood to sleep,I thought I'm the only one ,But Jingjing,you're sleepless ,too！ 白晶晶：你把胡子剃光干什么？你知不知道你少了胡子一點性格都沒有了？ Why you shave off your beard?You're just another guy without beard！ 白晶晶：唉，文也不行武也不行，你不做山賊，你想做狀元啊？省省吧你！改變什么形象，好好地做你山賊這份很有前途的職業去吧！ You can't do * you want to be a scholar instead of a robber?Please stop changing,being a robber is a good job！ 至尊寶：我知道了，我一定會繼續努力的！真失敗！原來晶晶姑娘喜歡粗獷一面的我！ I know,I'll try my * pathetic!Jingjing loves my violent side. 少女：神仙？妖怪？謝謝！哎！我現在鄭重宣布，這座山所有的東西都是屬于我的，包括你在內！ Immortals?Devil?Thank you!Listen to me, all things here belong to *e you！ 唐僧： 悟空你也太調皮了，我跟你說過叫你不要亂扔東西，你怎么又…你看我還沒說完你又把棍子給扔掉了！月光寶盒是寶物，你把他扔掉會污染環境，要是砸到小朋友怎么辦？就算砸不到小朋友砸到那些花花草草也是不對的！ Monkey King,you are so naughty!I've told you,you don't listen to me again,YOU threw away your * Pandora's Box is a * threw that * will pollute the enviroment!You will hurt kids! If there are not kids ,you'll hurt plants~. 唐僧：你想要啊？悟空，你要是想要的話你就說話嘛，你不說我怎么知道你想要呢，雖然你很有誠意地看著我，可是你還是要跟我說你想要的。你真的想要嗎？那你就拿去吧！你不是真的想要吧？難道你真的想要嗎？…… Do you like it ?Tell me if you do .I'll give you if you like it ,I won't give you if you don't tell me.I'm pretty sure that I will give you if you like it ,I'm pretty sure that I won't give you if you don't like *'re reasonble men~.I'll count to * me you like it or not。
悟空：大家看到啦？這個家伙沒事就長篇大論婆婆媽媽嘰嘰歪歪，就好象整天有一只蒼蠅，嗡……對不起，不是一只，是一堆蒼蠅圍著你，嗡…嗡…嗡…嗡…飛到你的耳朵里面，救命啊！ 所以呢我就抓住蒼蠅擠破它的肚皮把它的腸子扯出來再用它的腸子勒住他的脖子用力一拉，呵--！整條舌頭都伸出來啦！我再手起刀落嘩--！整個世界清凈了。
現在大家明白，為什么我要殺他！ You know the guy keep nagging all the * * like a fly !No,not a fly, It's a swarm of flies!Fly into your * !Help !I'll catch it and tear it's belly open,tear it's intestine out,then put it around it's neck,then pull it .It's tongue comes out,and then I use my blade to *~!The world becomes * you know why i want to eat it up！ 唐僧：唉，那個金剛圈尺寸太差，前重后輕左寬右窄，他帶上之后很不舒服，整晚失眠，會連累我嘛！他雖然是個猴子，可是你也不能這樣對他，官府知道了會說我虐待動物的！說起那個金剛圈，去年我在陳家村認識了一位鐵匠，他手工精美、價錢又公道、童叟無欺，干脆我介紹你再定做一個吧！ The size of the Gold Ring didn't suit * made him very * waering it he couldn't sleep well at *'s bad to me *ght he is a * still cann't abuse it,I'll be indicated animal abuse if the government knows * Gold Ring,I met a ironth at Chan's village last year,let me intruduce you to him and make a new one！ 畫外音：當時那把劍離我的喉嚨只有0.01公分，但是四分之一炷香之后，那把劍的女主人將會徹底地愛上我，因為我決定說一個謊話。雖然本人生平說過無數的謊話，但是這一個我認為是最完美的…… At this time the blade is really close to me 0.01cmI * after a short period of time 0.01secind,I think the owner of the sword will fall for me *e I've decided to tell lies .I've told many lies in my * I think it is the wonderful lie！ 紫霞：你再往前半步我就把你給殺了！ I'll kill you if you come close！ 至尊寶：你應該這么做，我也應該死。
曾經有一份真誠的愛情放在我面前，我沒有珍惜，等我失去的時候我才后悔莫及，人世間最痛苦的事莫過于此。你的劍在我的咽喉上割下去吧！不用再猶豫了！如果上天能夠給我一個再來一次的機會，我會對那個女孩子說三個字：我愛你。
如果非要在這份愛上。
9.英語短話劇劇本5人 搞笑點的.
話劇《荊軻刺秦王》 旁白（Aside ）/介紹（Introduction）: Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth. Action I 太子丹（上，掏出鏡子梳頭，做自戀狀）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world？ （畫外音：It's you, Prince Dan！ 太子丹高興狀） Thank u mirror！ （面對觀眾） I'm Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do？ （向幕里大叫） Where is my minister？ 阿三（畢恭畢敬） ： Honey, I am coming. 太子丹：I've told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”！ 阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作殺狀） 太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent！（二十一世紀最需要的是什么，人才！這句話要跟觀眾交流，最好由觀眾來回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做贊許狀） Good idea! But who is the right candidate？ 阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world. 太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK？ 阿三：Yes. Action II （《十面埋伏》中劉德華&金成武決斗時的音樂） 荊軻 Are you Li mochou？ 李莫愁 Yes. 荊軻 OK. I'm Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers' world. 李莫愁 Are you challenging me？ 荊軻 Off course！ 聳聳肩表示同意 李莫愁 Come on！ 音樂起 兩人沖上前來 “人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，兩刀砍死你啊.” 李莫愁倒地 荊軻大笑 李莫愁痛苦狀：What happened? Why aren't you hurt？ 荊軻： We don't need any reason to win a person. Don't we? Do we？ （贏一個人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？） 李莫愁：Momma always said: "Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you're gonna get." I got it, Momma is right. 荊軻再次大笑 太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you？ 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and you？ 太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”？ 荊柯：Sure！ 太子丹：How are you？ 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife？ 太子丹暈倒 荊柯：Hey, man, I'm kidding！ 太子丹：Oh, I'm kidding too！（畢恭畢敬）May I have your name card, please？ 荊軻從兜里掏出一卷紙，上面寫著： To be or not to be, that's a question. 阿三：Hero,we need your help. 荊柯：I am busy now！ 太子丹：You can get a lot of money. 荊柯：I am very busy now！ 阿三：IC, ID, IQ card？ 荊柯：I am very very busy now！ 阿三（手指上場的美女，激動狀）： Look! She is the most beautiful girl in the world. If you say O.K., she is yours. 荊柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love！ 阿三：What? What's the TCM？ 荊柯； Hey, guy! You look so smart but why you didn't know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer. 阿三：Excuse me? What's the TCM？ 觀眾甲：TCM - Traditional Chinese MM . 太子丹：I must show you the trump card. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea. It is a brand new product of Unilever China. 荊柯（激動）：Slimming tea! I have dreamed of it for thousands of times. My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn't reduce my weight. 阿三：You want? Speak up if you want! Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I'm very glad, you still have to speak up. Take it! Do you really like? Really？你不是真的想要吧？難道你真的想要嗎…… （《No matter》音樂起，荊軻先與阿三跳探戈，擁入懷中，又甩出去，阿三做嘔吐狀.然后荊軻與太子丹跳倫巴，最后太子丹擺一個女性化的造型，向后彎腰并抬其中一條腿，荊軻做調戲狀.） 荊柯（誠懇狀） Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you. 太子丹與阿三（撞胯，擊掌）Yeah! Action Ш （《大話西游》主題曲響起） 荊珂挽著妻子，太子丹，阿三在后. 阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River. 荊珂：Just stop here, please. Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby. （太子丹，阿三下.停頓.《泰坦尼克號》主題曲起，荊軻與妻子做Jack和rose在船頭的經典造型，忽然荊軻看到一個美女——此時一個中國古典美女經過，向荊軻拋媚眼，并拋下定情手絹.荊軻高興的盯著美女看，。